My heart feels heavy & exhausted and I’m barely touching the surface of this wild mission I am on. I retreated from everything for a year and secluded myself to get in touch with my inner self, with God, and in tune with the universe & all that dwells in it. In that time, a truth was revealed yet unbeknownst to me, this truth has proven to be beyond anything I’ve ever expected. I am completely unprepared. This world is full of so much pain. So many have been hurt, it has become easier to accept it then to overcome it.
I’ve encountered beautiful souls so tainted & damaged that love is a word with no meaning. Hope is a thing of fairy tales and trust is nonexistent. It’s not hard to get lost in the troubles of a cold world. I too found myself drifting into the darkness. I felt it slowly consuming me, and in my madness I found my beauty. My will & my strength, from that I grew courage to overcome the darkness that was clouding my judgement.
Once again, I stand alone but I stand firm.. not quite alone. God allows us to go through these moments of darkness to test us. I am constantly being tested. I fall, but I stand again. I get weak, but I always regain my strength. And I am reminded that I am not here for my own leisure but for a greater purpose. I know that I am not better than anyone, I am flawed. I am damaged. I am here as a humble servant. A warrior. A soldier fulfilling their duty. I am on a mission, & my soul will not rest until it is complete.